SOWING PEACE
Signed in as:
filler@godaddy.com
SOWING PEACE
Signed in as:
filler@godaddy.com
Information taken from El Buen Samaritano training and friends.
There are three worldviews that define culture and dictate how people live. Although every culture contains aspects of all three, each culture will predominately operate under one worldview. In North America, for example, Guilt and Innocence (or Right and Wrong) passed down by the Roman civilization is the dominating worldview. In this worldview, decisions are based on the law; choices are made by determining what is right or wrong according to the law; and man is guilty when he disobeys that law. Guilt must be proven and must have a consequence. This worldview is an individualistic mindset because guilt is an inward feeling and has to do with what an individual does.
In Islamic culture, the dominating worldview is Shame and Honor. Muslims think in terms of whether an action will bring shame or honor to them and their family, They base their decisions on the probable outcome of what will gain honor and not cause shame. Everything in every situation affects the shame and honor status of those involved. Communication is more about relationship than purpose.
In a shame-based society, shame is to be avoided at all costs; and honor and reputation must be protected at all costs. Shameful deeds are to be covered up. If honor is lost, it must be avenged to be restored. They might feel guilty for lying to their mother but feel ashamed for being such a child.
The Shame and Honor based culture is a group mindset. The center of social existence is the family not the individual because shame has to do with who a person is. Pride and honor of the family (or the community) is more important than that of the individual. Wherever the Muslim goes, they represent their family or group so they are not free to do whatever they wish because their actions affect the family. Shame is about the impact on the family and community.
Decisions are made as a group not individually.
Men have the final and last say in the decision.
For a Guilt and Innocence based culture, what is honorable or right is based on abiding by the law. For a Shame and Honor based culture, the unwritten law of society dictates the honorable and dishonorable way to live. In Islam there is no separation of church and state. Allah establishes how to live life not man, so the honorable and dishonorable way of doing things is what matters most.
"Guilt is about what you do. Honor is about who you are." (Quoted from a friend)
To gain a deeper understanding of the shame and honor based culture, read the blog post entitled "There is no spoon!"
The word ’Allah’ is the Arabic equivalent to the English word ‘God’ so does that mean that the Muslim’s Allah and the Christian’s Jehovah (YHWH) are the same God?
The culture in Muslim nations is to just stop by with the expectation that any time is a good time to sit, visit and share a welcome drink and a bite to eat.
The culture in America is to call ahead and make arrangements.
Calling and asking a day ahead and then calling when one is on the way helps immigrants adapt to American culture and enables Americans to make their plans.
Muslim immigrants tend to live more in the moment than Americans so appointments made too many days in advance may be forgotten. A reminder call is helpful as is flexibility when plans change at the last minute.
Greetings vary from culture to culture.
Americans tend to shake hands and hug.
In Muslim nations, women kiss women sometimes on one cheek and sometimes on both. The more kisses one gives, the deeper the friendship.
Men tend to do a handshake and quick embrace, but may even kiss the cheek as well.
Muslim men and women greet merely by word not by touch. If a hand is extended by a man to a woman, it is accepted with a quick and light grasp.
Within America, one may find all forms as each seeks to greet the other in an acceptable and respectful way.
As Americans, a visit of a few hours is considered quite long enough.
In the Muslim immigrant culture, a visit of 3-4 days is considered a really good visit! In America, that isn't expected, of course, though it would always be welcome.
A good and acceptable compromise between the two cultures is a 3 hour visit--2 hours is really too short--5 is better and 8 is good. No matter how long one stays, Muslims will want you to stay longer. It is a compliment that they enjoy your friendship.
However long one does stay visiting is appreciated and so much better than not visiting at all!
The best visit is the one in which time is not measured, only enjoyed together.
In Muslim immigrant homes, shoes are removed at the door so that the filth of the streets is not brought into the home. It is especially disrespectful to walk across carpet and rugs with shoes on.
Pointing or directing the soles of the feet in anyone's direction is considered especially offensive to a Muslim. It is seen as a curse being hurled at them. Caution in keeping ones feet pointed downward at all times will avoid sending accidental and unintended messages.
In Muslim culture it is an insult not to allow someone who comes to visit into your house and offer them something to eat and drink. It is a unspoken statement about friendship.
Food shared is trust earned. Like the salt covenants of old, it is an agreement that cannot be taken back. Eating together is worth its weight in salt!
Remember never to serve anything made with alcohol, pork or lard.
Americans--male and female alike--typically dress (clothing, makeup and hair) with great care to look 'their best'. They often believe that showing off their shape, form or skin is attractive. While they do this to be attractive, it is not typically meant as a sexual invitation.
In Islam, women who dress in tight clothing, or show off their hair or skin are typically seen as expressly trying to draw male attention.
It is a woman's responsibility not to draw male attention to herself which is why many Islamic women wear hair scarves and very modest clothing.
When visiting a Muslim home, it would be more respectful for any women to wear long loose-fitting pants and long-sleeve loose-fitting shirts. This doesn't mean a woman must cover their hair and dress like their Muslim friend, but practicing some modesty goes a long way with developing friendship, and helps avoid misinterpretation.
In America, big grins with teeth showing is how one communicates joy at seeing a friend or meeting someone new, expresses interest in conversation and affirms the person with whom they are talking.
Likewise, an American uses direct eye contact to express honesty, openness and interest in the conversation.
For Muslim immigrants, baring a smile that shows teeth or prolonged eye contact with anyone of the opposite sex is a come-on.
A Muslim woman may often be seen averting her eyes or covering her mouth when she is laughing so as to not communicate underlying messages.
One needs to keep these differences in mind when talking with someone of the opposite sex.
Home visits should never happen if there is not an adult of the same sex as the visitor in the home.
All physical contact between opposite sexes should be avoided (beyond the initial greeting where a handshake may be acceptable if proffered by the Muslim first.)
Misconception that Christians hold about Muslims
Muslims don't keep their commitments or their word.
Truth
Muslims tend to live more in the moment whereas Americans tend to live more by a schedule.
If a Muslim has an appointment and someone stops by their house to visit, they will forego the scheduled appointment and attend to the present guest. It would be rude and disrespectful to tell their guest to leave because they have an appointment.
It is not a matter of whether they spoke the truth or not when making the commitment, but rather that they will keep that commitment providing something doesn't come up to interrupt it.
This is why Muslims say, "Insha'Allah" when making plans. It means, "If it be God's will" because many things may come up before that time that will prevent them from being able to keep their appointment.
Misconception that Muslims hold about Christians
Western women are all prostitutes because of the way they dress, show their teeth when they smile or look men directly in the eye when conversing.
Truth
Americans smile to affirm friendship and continue conversation. The broader the smile, the more the person is communicating that everything is okay and the conversation can continue.
A closed mouth smile communicates a lack of interest in the conversation.
Eye contact is a sign of respect and honesty. To not look someone in the eye, regardless of gender, communicates a lack of respect and honesty.
Misconception that Christians hold about Muslims
Muslims that kiss others of the same sex on the cheek all the time are homosexuals.
Truth
The kiss of a greeting has nothing to do with sexual desire but rather friendship and care.
Sowing Peace
Copyright © 2021 Sowing Peace - All Rights Reserved.
Powered by GoDaddy Website Builder